Lack confidence because you’re too shy, self-conscious or anxious?

I spent the first part of my life being too shy. I was acutely self-conscious and felt as if I was trapped in a box. I was always on the sidelines, watching other people participating and enjoying themselves.

I desperately wanted to get out of that box and join them. But I didn’t know how.

I got to the point when I HAD TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!

Had enough of being too shy?

Shyness is learned or adapted behaviour, and therefore, can be unlearned.

It is most commonly the result of painful experiences that have caused you to shut down and to retreat into your shell.

Many introverts become shy, like me, because of the social pressures that are put on them by other people – to be more social, more outgoing, more of a team player.  If you are not able to play the social game, you are simply ignored or excluded. If you’ve had enough of these experiences, you very quickly become shy.

Overcoming shyness is not going to happen overnight and needs determination and commitment to unlearn that behaviour. But it can be achieved much quicker and easier than you would think. Certainly a lot quicker than most other methods that don’t do anything to dissolve your shyness. I did it and the last thing that people think I am now is too shy.

TOO SHY Greatest Fear = Greatest Freedom

Something inside me told me drama was the way, even though it was the last thing I wanted to do – to perform in front of other people, to expose myself, to make a fool of myself.

But I was to discover that my greatest fear was the passage to my greatest freedom.  Drama set me free and set me on a life course that I had never dreamed I would follow.

Much to my surprise, it was much easier than I thought it was going to be. Drama requires stepping into the shoes of another character. It felt very strange at first, but the more I was able to imagine I was the other character, the easier it was.

I wasn’t “being me”, the too shy girl, I had become someone else.

This was also something I had learned how to do as a child – to play pretend games. I had never left me. (This is the same for you too even if you never played as a child as it is one of the developmental stages of childhood.)

As the character, I started doing saying things that the Too Shy Claire would never say and do – and it was fun. I even felt a little bit naughty getting away with doing and saying these things. And even more extraordinary, I was applauded for doing this. 

A Making Moves participant discovering the freedom to express herself

Applause is very powerful because it sends messages into the brain and into the unconscious that what you are doing is “good”.

My shyness simply disappeared. And so can yours.

Watch this video and learn how I overcame my shyness and how I’ve helped hundreds of shy people put an end to this excruciating experience.

The Right Conditions

But before any of this can happen, the conditions have to be right. This is especially the case if you are too shy or experience high levels of anxiety.

This is what is so different about the Sunflower Effect and the courses I run.

The first and most important condition is safety – a safe place in which to have permission to make mistakes and to make a bit of a fool of yourself and where no-one’s going to laugh at you because you’re behaving differently. When you start, you’re going to feel pretty awkward and self-conscious.

The most important part of this is the emotional safety that isn’t present in many drama classes. The block to most shy people’s expression is not just fear of what others think of you, but what you think of yourself. It is the inner observer watching what you do, censuring everything you say, always trying to control, suppress and constrain your behaviour.

Having a safe place to overcome self-consciousness is what makes the difference

If you join the Shyness the Way Out a live stream course, or the  Breakthrough course, my core courses for overcoming shyness, you will have a safe place with other people who feel in the same boat as you, who understand what it feels like to be too shy. This is what makes the difference.

You will have an opportunity to try out new behaviours by playing characters that are very different from you, and this will enable you to gradually come out of your shell.

In my book From Wallflower to Sunflower, I explain why this is so effective at breaking the old patterns of being too shy. This is what happened to me. See below.

See Do I need any drama experience? 


I recommend the Breakthrough Group, which is specifically designed for shy, self-conscious and anxious people. It’s a safe environment in which you can gradually come out of your shell and experiment with new behaviours.

Or you may want to join my

Many people have come into this group absolutely frozen with fear, and by the end of the group have completely put shyness behind them. They find themselves participating just the same in the group as everyone else – no longer the “wallflower on the dance floor”.

Just Amazing!
“That overwhelming feeling of being fed up of being the quiet one and not being able to express myself and almost feeling like a fraud when I’m shy with people I don’t know well. Is why I began my journey with Claire. It now feels like I’m constantly stretching my confidence like you would do if you were overweight and needed to go to the gym. Week by week I started to see progress. Stretching out of my comfort zone, losing excess worries and self-doubt on the way like layers of clothes. I’m so grateful for Claire, and also the people that attend you really do realise that you’re not in this alone others are going through similar experiences and we will overcome it together. Thank you, Claire, you have literally changed my life.”
Vanessa, November 2017 Verified review from Hotcourses 

I also offer a 100% money-back guarantee if you don’t get anything out of the course. If you are extremely shy or anxious, your shyness is there for a good reason – and it’s not going to shift overnight, and you’ll probably need at least two courses before you’ll start seeing significant changes. This is important. Sustained change over a period of time is what leads to long-lasting and, in time, permanent change.

Many people also supplement the course with some individual sessions (particularly if you have a high level of self-c0nsciousness that is preventing you from shifting in the way you would like). Sometimes only one session is needed.  Dissolving the psychological blocks to your shyness is what is going to make the difference, and this deeper work is.

It takes courage and commitment to overcome the discomfort, but that is what is needed – and with the support of other people all rooting for you.

More about the Breakthrough Group

Set up a time to speak to me

If you’re not sure if Breakthrough is right for you, you can set up a time to speak to me, (it’s free) so I can get more of a sense of what is going to be the best course for you.

Book a telephone consultation with Claire

Join an Introductory Evening

beginners confidence building
Another good way to start
is to come to an Introductory Evening.

This will give you a taste of what to expect if you join the Breakthrough course or Shyness the Way Out online course.

This is what people have said about their experience of attending:

Feeling brave after attending
I just wanted to say a big thank you for organising the Intro Evening last night. I had a really great time and felt so much better when I left. I was excited and energised – in fact I was feeling so brave I attended a drama class today! I’ve been trying to pluck up the courage to attend this drama class for around 3 years but never quite made it, but today I went and it was brilliant! Without your class I would never have been able to do this so thanks to you.  I’m really looking forward to starting the full Breakthrough course in September. I can’t wait!!

Suzie Baddley, legal secretary

Came in feeling nervous, left feeling confident
The taster session yesterday was great! I came in feeling nervous and left feeling confident. Also, it was a great opportunity to network with others. The session helped to increase my confidence. I’ve since had a great week and not felt like this for ages. I’ve even been stressed from work and a lack of sleep but I still feel confident. Also my voice better. I’m more relaxed and calm.

Ram, IT professional


Subscribe to the Making Moves newsletter and receive three free chapters from my book: From Wallflower to Sunflower (£14.99)

In these chapters, you’ll discover:

  • Why you’re not alone, and why more people are identifying themselves as wallflowers
  • The biggest mistake that wallflowers make when they’re trying to build confidence.
  • Discover the magic power to break old habits and create new patterns of confident behaviour you’ve had the whole time – but you didn’t know it.

You’ll also receive regular free resources, tips and support for your journey to greater confidence, as well as information about my highly effective confidence courses.

Subscribe now to receive your free chapters emailed straight to your inbox, and join a community of people like you, who are ready to change their lives.

Book an Individual Session

For some people coming into a group is too big a step in which case a series of individual sessions will help to prepare you. Basically, the more of this kind of work you do, the quicker you will learn new skills and banish the old habit of being too shy.

Or, read about how I banished shyness forever.

Or see our Frequently Asked Questions Section for any questions you may have.

Or you may like to email me and tell me a little bit about yourself and what you are struggling with?

Useful Links

Shyness the Way Out Livestream Course
Breakthrough Group
Finding Your Voice
I Don’t Know What to Say Improvisation course
How to get started
Details of all courses
Frequently Asked Questions

My book: From Wallflower to Sunflower

From Wallflower to Sunflower breaks new ground in the field of confidence-building. A former wallflower, she stumbled by chance on a very simple and effective way to build a natural and lasting confidence.

Claire Schrader has developed the Sunflower Effect,  a proven confidence-building system using an adapted form of drama, that has assisted many hundreds of people to move from “Wallflower to Sunflower” (to becoming naturally self-confident).

The book is highly practical, grounded in psychology and scientific research and offers a step-by-step guide with proven strategies, practical tips, exercises and free online resources.

Reading the book will enable you to get more out of the Breakthrough Group because you will understand more about how the Sunflower Effect works.

From Wallflower to Sunflower – the quiet person’s path to natural self-confidence  by Claire Schrader

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New here?

Want to know what’s coming up soon?

My regular courses started January 19th 2021 and all are running on zoom. It may not be too late to join.

If you’re feeling ready to take the plunge and book for one of my courses – here’s a bit of useful info as to where to get started:

The Breakthrough Group is the first step for many people – particularly if you feel shy, self-conscious or experience social anxiety. I’ve seen some miraculous transformations in my 20 years of running this course.

The current course started:
Tues 19th Jan @ 7pm

Or, if speaking up in groups, being heard, or any kind of public speaking is your challenge, then the  Finding Your Voice course is a good place to start. Particularly if anxiety or nerves are an issue. I’ve had people with very severe symptoms including panic attacks, overcome these issues with relative ease.

The next course will run on zoom and will start:
Started Wed 20th Jan  @7pm

“I don’t know what to say” improvisation for social confidencei s great for people with average confidence who experience some form of social anxiety or awkwardness but find themselves stumped with knowing what to say. Working through improvisation and will transform your verbal confidence and social skills.

The next course will run on zoom and will start: Started Wednesday, 20th Jan @ 10 am & Thursday 21st Jan @ 6 pm

All these course will run again in May (face-to-face).

Next Express Yourself Workshop, is on March 14th 10.30 am-5.30 pm (subject to govt restrictions_- another great way to get started.

Find out what it’s like to attend a Sunflower Effect  Course by the next Introductory Evening on  April 13th 7.30-9.30pm. We plan to run this face-to face.

A great way to get a taste of what to expect before joining one of my courses.

You can book online for all my courses and events.

If you’re not sure which course is right for you, book a telephone appointment with me or get in touch by email

I look forward to hearing from you

Best, Claire